Taking the Last Steps On Our 12-Step Journey
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Dear Friends,  

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In this week's newsletter, we'll take on the last of the 12-steps along this journey. As you learn more in these final steps, I encourage you to bookmark these pages and revisit them when you feel anxiety and shame start to creep back in.

 

If you missed the previous newsletters in the series, please take a moment to read these before you join us for Steps Nine through Twelve:
 

• Introduction to the 12-Step Series

• Steps One and Two on Your 12-Step Public Speaking Journey

• Steps Three through Five: Taking the Next Steps on Your 12-Step Public Speaking Journey

• Embrace the Challenge of Steps Six through Eight

 

Step Nine: Be Willing to Lose Everything to Gain (or Regain) Your Soul.

 

Sometimes we care more about what our family, friends, and associates will think than our own wellbeing. As much as I adore my family, I had to be willing to lose them in order to tell my truth because keeping it secret was killing me. I got breast cancer and am completely convinced it appeared because of hiding my secrets and stuffing my shame. I realized that whoever left me because I shared my story wasn’t really with me in the first place, I was able to get the courage to speak up. As you might have guessed, instead of being abandoned, the opposite happened: I was surrounded by support, encouragement, and endless love.

 

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Step Ten: Watch Shame Lose its Power as You Speak.

 

You will physically, mentally, and emotionally feel a release when you share your shame. It will no longer have power over you. Now you’ll be free to decide if you want to share that part of your story more widely or keep it between you and who you chose to share it with it. Even if you never talk about it with others, you will notice that you’re now willing to share more of you that you had been holding back, and that lets you connect more deeply with those listening to or reading your story.

 

I’ve witnessed so many people (including myself) let out the biggest exhale you can imagine after sharing what they had labeled “shame” as they saw it transform into an admirable act of courage.

 

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Step Eleven: Inspire Others by Shining a Light on Shame and Bringing it from the Darkness.

 

A miracle happens when you share your long-hidden story. It not only frees you; it frees others to share. Every time I speak about the years I was trafficked, or when I do a Q&A after a screening of my documentary, at least one person comes up to me and says, “I’ve never told anyone this before, but…” and tells me their story of abuse or trauma. It’s a gift for them to be able to release it and it’s a gift to me to receive that trust.

 

As Marianne Williamson wrote, “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” So shine that bright, beautiful, bold light of yours!

 

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Step Twelve: Do It! Just Do It!

 

Don’t feel like it? Do it anyway. We can think of hundreds of excuses why we can’t do something that is challenging and when we “just do it,” those excuses fade away and are replaced with pure satisfaction. Still can’t get started? Then go back to Step Six and ask for help…it will magically appear! If you hear yourself saying, “But…,” JUST DO IT!!!

 

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Thank you for traveling this 12-Step Journey with me. These 12 steps will support you in recovering your confidence and reclaiming your voice—your audience is waiting!

 

With gratitude,

Amy

 

Amy Ayoub

President, The Zen Speaker

info@thezenspeaker.com | thezenspeaker.com